Are we being “bad” friends?
admin | Jan 12, 2011 | Comments 4
Question by Adri: Are we being “terrible” friends?
This might me a bit long…i tend to ramble i will apologize in advance…
We (my preeminent friend and I) have a very close friend that is getting married next January. She recently went to FL, and we live in NY. She will be getting married in Disney.
When she 1st for engaged, she had told us we would be in the wedding party as well. In the end she only opted for a maid of honor, which is better for us (less expensive). In June, she will be flying to NY for us to have her “bachalorette weekend” which I will be using my bosses Hampton household for.
Now, for that weekend, her and her maid of honor want us to take off from work on Friday (they really expected us to do so, without ASKING 1st). When we said we possibly can not, she got mad @ us, only for us to find out that 2 other girls that will be coming for the weekend are only coming up for one day! Why is it ok for the rest of them to come up for one day, but we have to take off from work? And everything for that weekend is intended to the minute…
Now…even even if the wedding is 8 months away, and WE ARE NOT in the wedding party,we are just guests, she calls us @ smallest amount 4 times a week to talk about lodge arrengements and flight arrengements and this and that. And she would like us to be there on a specific day @ a specific time, which means more time off from work for us. She also wants us to book certain hotels ONLY, but we have a timeshare which maybe cheaper for us to book through them. When we mentioned this to her, she again got very upset with us, that we are not “going along with her plans”.
With the way the economy is going, we’re just trying to fit this whole wedding in our budget. If staying @ the lodge she chose for is is cheaper, then yea, we would stay there, but if it’s cheaper to stay @ the time share then most certently we will stay there.
Are we being “terrible” or “rude” friends that we are complaning?
If people are just gonna be rude…then don’t answer!
Preeminent answer:
Answer by teduardosportacus
you lost me after 3 sentences.
Eat Funyuns.
Know better? House your own answer in the comments!
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I dindt even read your rambling but if you are questioning yourself than yes you probably are being a terrible friend.
Your not a terrible friend ,weddings are stressful times that’s probably why she is like this. Stay in the lodge you want, she will be so pleased on her lofty day it won’t matter what happens before!!!
I realize that its your friend’s lofty day, on the other hand she seems to be very demanding! You shouldn’t be expected to drop everything in your life just to accommodate her wishes. Let her know that you will do the very preeminent that you can to aid out. But you have a life as well, and you must tend to that initially and foremost.
It is a lofty day for your friend but she opted for you two not to be in the wedding party. Therefore you two should not have to follow her plans exactly how she wants them. Not all of the guests at her wedding are going to follow her plans exactly. It is very hard in this economy and I reckon that you should go with your plot (Whatever that may be) and caution the bride that it is cheaper for you two to do it that way. She should just be pleased that you two are going to be there. You are not being mean or rude. I also know that it is hard to take off days from work and if she wants you to take off a lot of days question her if she is going to pay your bills. At some jobs taking a day off means taking a day off your pay. I don’t know how your job is but if she wants you to go through all this expense and take off all these days of work then I would caution her that either you and your other friend are going to do it the way you two choose or you may not go at all because it is just too expensive. If she gets upset then caution her your sorry but thats just the way it works preeminent for you.